Spirited Mama

Living a SPIRITED life filled with wanderlust, emotions and everything in between

Category: Women

Learning to value MY own opinion

My opinion matters

I am learning to value and appreciate MY own opinion more and more each day. There was a time where I too was looking for my parents’ recognition BUT I am happy to report that those days are long gone. And guess what Life has been so much better since.

However, I am my worst critic…

I came across this post over at Tyranny of pink. So well said. It was and is what has been lying in my subconscious for a very very long time. Somehow, I just needed to get over myself and tell myself out old that “I AM ENOUGH”!

Spirited Mama

x

P.S. Tomorrow is #37weekspregnant. Dr will decide tomorrow if the resident alien should come this week or if we can wait until #38weekspregnant. I’m freaking out just a tad as it feels it’s happening too soon…

#freethenipple

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Do you know about Free the Nipple

@freethenipple Have you seen this? Are you aware of it? What do you make of it?

I wrote a post about Empowering Women, you can read it here, and it just so happens to be based on my opinions and thought about gender equality or rather gender inequality. This past Sunday, @carteblanchetv did a segment on the #FreetheNipple by founder Lina Esco. Here is a snippet of what Free the Nipple is about, just click here.

Even though we claim that we live in a society where we preach gender equality, are we really seeing women and men as equals? Lina Esco even made a movie about the campaign.

Out of sheer curiosity, let’s do a poll:

Spirited Mama

P.S. This also brings me back to a question that surfaces ALL the time – What is SO wrong with women breastfeeding in public? If you are hungry, you get something to eat. You eat in public don’t you? So why can a mother not feed her hungry child in public?

Empowering women? Are we really ready?

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This was a random picture my Dude sent to me. Roughly translated “Once upon a time there was a woman that wasn’t full of shit. But that was a very long time ago… and it was only that one day“. Unfortunately, he caught me on a day where I felt I needed to reinforce my independence and I then replied with this

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Roughly translated “Once upon a time, men used to hunt and make fires and didn’t get involved/butt in“.

Are we really empowering women?

So the phrase “empowering women” has been on my mind for a long time. Are we, as a society, really ready to empower women? Are we giving it our best shot? Or are we doing it half heartedly because someone said we must?

More and more women are doing what was once considered “the man’s job” in previous times. Does it look like more and more men are OK with women moving into “their” domain? I am all for being a liberal independent woman. My Dude sometimes gets upset because he wants to do something for me but I am not helpless. I can do some things for myself, thank you very much. It doesn’t make me any less of a woman and it surely doesn’t make him any less of a man, well that is my opinion.

I am me. I am strong. And I am strong willed, sometimes just stubborn. I will do what I need to do for myself. Because I can. And because I like my independence.

Do women deserve to be empowered?

Some women actually do a much better job, in different domains, than a man would do. Yet somehow women are still not seen as equals to their male counterparts. Has society indoctrinated us so badly that we only see women as being barefeet, pregnant and standing behind a stove? From personal experience, it was typical of some of my working environments, the males felt threatened by women in top positions. Are men really still intimidated by their woman’s paycheck? Is it really SO bad if she brings home the bacon?

Why do people frown upon a SAHM, stay at home mom? If you can afford it, why not? If that is what you want to do. No one will raise your kid(s) the way YOU want to. What about stay at home Dads? Has society accepted it? These dads are so few and far in between. Why is it that men are some of the biggest critics of stay at home dads? Does it really take away your manliness? Balancing family and a career is tough. In my opinion, something has got to give. Whether it is time spent with family or chasing that dream JOB. The aim is finding YOUR balance, your ZEN. What works for you and your family might not be ideal for mine.

Whatever happened to having an equal partnership with your spouse? Co-existing in unison, peace and harmony. And hopefully surrounded by love… Spirited Mama

Spirited Mama

P.S. I suspect that the USA wasn’t quite ready for such a liberal move as having a female president. Were they scared? Who knows why America got TRUMPED.

Happiness vs my full time salary…

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Money is not everything BUT it sure does make everything a bit easier!

I am battling with a huge decision to go back to working half day. Working half day = half the salary

Now, this is not a new venture as I had this same debacle when I changed jobs in 2013… It was very beneficial to my family as Dudie got the best of his mom. Now here I sit at the crossroads again

The resident alien is due in February 2017. Of course I can justify taking the half day job to give the resident alien the best of me too. I am just scared shitless as I would again take half a salary. Only difference this time – I have another person to take care of. Yes my Dude is AMAZING. And happily supports our family but I have this huge chip on my shoulder called “Independence”!

In January this year, I started working full time again and boy oh boy did my extra salary come in handy…SHit we even acquired another property…

What kills me is that for me my family comes first. I have a flexible work environment but I do feel that I am doing the resident alien an injustice by working full time. In more ways than one, I have technically made my decision already but I just can’t help but worry about balance sheets and bank statements.

This morning I came across this post, Being a stay at home parent is a luxury, on Harassed Mom’s facebook page and people the lights went on! This describes how I have been feeling. How I am currently feeling. Why do I need to prove anything to anyone? I had my cushy fancy job at Wits Univeristy and I traded it for a half day job. I must admit I felt worthless. Some days I still feel as if I am wasting my talents in this job BUT if I look at what it means for my family the benefits outweigh the title

Why do I need to prove anything to anyone? I had my cushy fancy job at Wits Univeristy and I traded it for a half day job. I must admit I felt worthless. Some days I still feel as if I am wasting my talents in this job BUT if I look at what it means for my family the benefits outweigh the title any day!  I am there for every match, practise, knee scrape and concert! Dudie is sooo flabbergasted if I say I  won’t be able to come watch something that fo him it is incomprehensible…how can Mom NOT be there? I just can’t imagine having the crazy full-time job and 2 kids at home, homework, supper, bath time and hope and pray that the husband and I can squeeze in some “us” time too.

The resident alien is coming. I think I need to give him the best of me too. Who knows perhaps I can find alternative income sources soon. At this point, my brain is fried but I need to take stock and perhaps sit in a quiet spot somewhere and figure out what is out there/ what I can bring to the “proverbial” table in the world.

I have been doing some research and perhaps I am looking in all the wrong places. I found the workingmothersexpo. Think I need to get myself there to find some inspiration!

Why is it so hard to be a working mom???? Change is inevitable. CHANGE is coming! I am scared BUT I am excited!

Spirited Mama

Kievits Kroon for some R & R

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On Thursday 6 October, I headed to Kievits Kroon Country Estate and Spa for some much needed R & R… It has been a bit busy in Spiritville and then there were some changes on the work front, not my doing but we Dude and I will manage, we somehow always land on our feet. We have some contingency plans but looking at the bigger picture we are thinking that it might just be in God’s plan for us seeing as how we are also expecting the resident alien soon…

Kievits Kroon Spa, you pampered me beyond my expectations. As an expectant mom I was slightly apprehensive about going to the spa but I was assured that a trained therapist would take care of me…and she definitely took care of me. I actually found myself dozing off and snoring during my therapy session…yes, you know that sleep where you hear yourself snoring and wake up and think shit did I just snore out loud…that was me. I am 22 weeks pregnant and although I feel good I just can’t stay awake past 8pm anymore…no matter what I do I just can’t stay up late.

After my session I was treated to a three course meal in their Signature restaurant…OMG, that food was sooo good.

Starter – Crispy fried duck savoury pancake with peas and soy foam

Main – Prawn fettuccine with aioli and white wine saffron sauce

Dessert – Warm battered banana, coconut and vanilla deep fried ice-cream and caramel sauce

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Kievits Kroon I thank you for a lovely day of pampering. I will be back…Let me just monitor my budget….

Spirited Mama

P.S. I am thinking that this is the perfect venue for my resident alien’s baby shower…

I AM WOMAN

I am a WOMAN, and yes that is most certainly my super power.

As women we tend to downplay our lives, our achievements, our dreams/ambitions/goals so that we can help others (whomever these others may be but you know who I am referring to right…others who always miraculously enter our lives just when we think ahhh let me do just this one thing for myself)

Well today there is really no beating around the bush. My blog post is dedicated to me and ALL the WOMEN out there.

I have many ideas but often stagnate and procrastinate. I lose my shit when things don’t go my way. I can have a temper tantrum…aka adult tantrum. I am not perfect but I am ME.

I am not a perfect size 8 10 12 but I have curves and a very unique physique. Oh hell right now I am not sure what my size will be next week as the resident alien is growing at a rapid pace right now. Can’t believe I am 20 weeks already. Halfway. Fck, before we know it he will be here…

I am a women, a girl,  a wife,a lover, a mom, a daughter, a sister, granddaughter, a cousin, a friend, an aunt, a godmother, a colleague and soooo much more…I am phenomenal. I AM WOMAN.

Spirited Mama

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LIFE IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU ARE MAKING OTHER PLANS…JOHN LENNON

So it was officially women’s day yesterday, 9 August  and yes I know there is alot of history behind but I will spare you the info (click here if you need to know why we celebrate women’s day). I just wanted this day for myself. You see I don’t have to do the usual school run or even go to work. Bless the government for giving WOMEN a special day and making it a public holiday. <Dear Government, My Dude is very pissed at you. He wants to know why MEN don’t have their own special day. But we will continue this conversation on another day…

So I wanted to lie in bed and have a hearty breakfast of Ferrero Rocher but alas….Let’s just say that my family has been dealt a few blows and we are still in shock and trying to just come to terms with the situation….

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On the other hand I have been receiving random emails about The Working Mothers Expo. Now initially I thought I was being spammed as usual. Probably someone wanting to hack my credit card but I ‘ve got news for you….you won’t get much >LOL! But it seems this expo is legitimate. I have been reading up on it and I am actually intrigued to find out more about it.

If you are interested go check it out The Working Mothers Expo. It’s happening 4-6 Nov 2016 in Sandton, Johannesburg.

HAPPY WOMEN’S DAY to all the WOMEN out there. Enjoy you day off…

Be beautiful. Be brave. Be YOU!

Spirited Mama

P.S. I have these little conversations with myself, in my head, all the time. So I have now resorted to giving myself an inspirational pep talk. How do you like my motto for now?

Be beautiful. Be brave. Be YOU!

P.P.S. I had a draft of this post but I just couldn’t bring myself to log on yesterday. I edited this post because of course now it was completely out of context. Many tears were shed yesterday but I read somewhere that “tears are liquid prayers”. Today I feel a sense of calm but yet the uncertainty and anxiety is eating at me…Today might not be a great day but perhaps tomorrow will be. I will try again tomorrow.

 

New Consumer Watchdog on the prowl

 Self proclaimed consumer watchdog and RIP Isabel Jones

I’m officially dubbing myself as the new consumer watchdog via my blog. I’ve wondered way too many times why I buy certain things. Maybe it’s because the ad was great/enticing/cunning/just a great ad/ whatever it may be I fell for it. Then I get to try *insert relevant product here* and voila it doesn’t work the way it’s supposed to. Or it doesn’t do what it’s supposed to. Many of you might be familiar with Isabel Jones and I must add that I was taken aback when I heard of her passing, RIP Isabel Jones. I thought “Who would tell me about “What not to buy” or “What is just a load of crap” etc. Somewhere< I actually thought that “I” could be a consumer watchdog. I don’t want to have a TV show, ok maybe later but just a few cameo appearances nothing major. > But I could definitely give you a couple of reviews that would shock the nation.

I hardly drink alcohol. I gave up smoking. But I do love shopping! I do love shopping! <for the record I don’t think shopping is a girls thing. My Dude gets more excited about a sale than me. I am not kidding.>

Shopping is my vice. Online/in person/ though an agent, doesn’t matter. <My friends think that I’m a groupon junkie – for the record I love groupon.>

Epic fail with some consumer products

1. Vacuum bags  – this worked maybe for a week and then it popped in my cupboard, spilling items. You know the ones I’ talking about? The storage bags where you can store crap, use a vacuum to suck out the air and flattened it. Basically it gives you much needed space in your cupboards.

2. Manicure set – Woe is me – when I tried this battery operated thingy I thought that I was about to grind off my hand never mind my nail. I hardly have time to do nails so this was a way of getting an express mani. This thing is a serious hazard. I’m going to donate it to Dude – he can use it in the garage. Think of it as a mini grinder.

3. Potato peeler – that supposedly makes those yummy spirally potato stick things. I must admit I’ve never tried it because I don’t know how to assemble it and every time I try to assemble it the thing falls apart. We bought this product a good couple of years ago.

4. Russell Hobs Take two coffee maker – I loved the idea because it was coffee on the go. BUT I drink hot coffee. By the time you’re done brewing the coffee is not even warm it’s luke warm. Epic fail Russell Hobbs.

5. Pineware frying pan – Yesterday I bought a frying pan at PnP hyper. It was on special and I’ve been wanting to buy a smaller one as we have a big one but I want or rather need a smaller one. I assemble the knob to the lid and 1, 2, 3 it breaks. The knob. Now I have a frying pan lid with a screw attached but no knob. I have to go and exchange it today. Can I bill PnP for my fuel? It’s costing me an extra trip and no one is covering my fuel. So what I saved on the purchase price I’m spending on fuel.

Spirited Mama

You just can’t win. That’s enough ranting for one day. Just a quick question – Has anyone registered for E-tolling? It seems that no one is taking this seriously. But how can we when the fuel is higher, the food is more expensive and the electricity as well as the rates and taxes. I don’t think that I’m going to get a e-tag. Sorry Sanral. Government – you need to give back the Pension money…

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