Spirited Mama

Living a SPIRITED life filled with wanderlust, emotions and everything in between

Tag: choices Page 4 of 11

Starting 2017 from my hospital bed

By

On January 9, 2017

In Hospitals, Pregnancy

Starting 2017

I’m amazed at how calm and accepting I am of my current situation, being hospitalised at #35weekspregnant. My doctor has been monitoring me closely, as I’ve had traces of protein in my urine since 29weeks of my pregnancy. I’ve had more than average swelling but my blood pressure has been stable. Just last week, on 1 January 2017 to be exact at 3am Dude and I were discussing the possibility of taking a drive to Durban just because… well We went to bed just after 4am and I woke up with a very strong conviction that I should stay close to my doctor as well as my hospital of choice. It was something that couldn’t be explained but I knew that I had to believe in my sixth sense.

Dude: Why you worried about who catches the baby, if he decides to come? There should be good doctors and hospitals in Durban. 

Me: Not wanting to sound rude but the next time you carry the baby/are pregnant we can take that drive. All I can think about is that horrid episode on Carte Blanche about the lack of service delivery in the hospitals on the N3….

We chilled at home, and I burnt myself to a crisp in the swimming pool. No amount of sunscreen of playing in the shade helped. I am still peeling, face, arms, shoulders, back etc….but it was sooo worth it. I don’t think I have swam this much when I was pregnant with Dudie, 7 years ago. And it helped that Dudie loved being in the pool with me.

The 2nd of January, I decided that we needed to get out of the house. I rallied the troops, even though I had no idea what we would do for the day. I eventually got them all out the house at 1pm. We headed out to Hartebeespoort dam for an ice-cream, cos man alive I was wishing for that bubblegum ice-cream at the Chameleon village. It was so worth the drive.

I ended up buying some lovely trinkets and just stuff because I was in the mood. We ended the afternoon with the most deliciously early supper at Woody’s family grill. Omg, my burger was to die for.img_0629

Back to hospital, not a fun way to start 2017

I went back to work on 4 January as I wanted to sort out the last couple of things in my office before I go on maternity leave. That first day was soooo incredibly hard. I managed to get through the 4 days. On route home on Friday, my doctor calls with some test results which we did the day before, and says “You need to be admitted ASAP”. Me, ok….I am on my way home now so let me get my bags and stuff and I will be at the hospital later.

Well thank goodness i had packed our hospital bags 2days prior, albeit not entirely complete but at least it was packed. I informed my family and we had a late lunch/very early supper at home one last time as a family of 3 + my Great Aunt. (thankfully she is still visiting and can assist Dude and Dudie with keeping our home fires burning).

I was admitted on Friday, 6 January. Diagnosis is Pre-eclampsia. This is all new to me, never had this before. But I’m taking it in my stride and doing what I need to do for this littlest member of of family to have a better chance at a quality life. My doctor has informed me that I will remain in hospital until the baby is born, as she is just not willing to take any chances. I am constantly bring monitored. I love the fact that we are on the same page, and in no way do I feel pressurised, as we want to wait as long as possible so that this boy can stay in utero a bit longer. For now our aim is to get to 37 weeks perhaps even 38, but thats more me than the dr….I guess that technically I am on leave now until Winter 2017 😁

I am sad that I will be missing Dudie’s first day of Gr.2 this week but Dude will be making his day special for him. Just the thought of being away from one another, we are a close Spirited family, rocked our boat a bit. 2-3weeks in hospital, them visiting everyday -thankfully the hospital allows a spouse and own kids to visit any time of the day. I can see my Dude and Dudie is tkaing strain but doing the best they can. They are very independent but I think its just knowing that we are not together at home which is taking its toll on them.

How my hospital stays are affecting my older child

Last night Dude and I discussed how this situation is affecting Dudie. Even though he knows it is necessary for my and his brother’s health and well-being to be in hospital, we can see that it has affected his stability, his environment, his life. He even said that his brother shouldn’t come looking for attention, he should just sort himself out😂. Smart kid this one, baby listen to your brother…

I am on day 4 of my extended hospital stay. I won’t lie-it’s not easy just lying in this bed. But I’m being forced to take it easy and just rest for my and my baby’s well-being. From my previous post, Goodbye 2016, I decided that I was going to live my best life. Well if this is how I have to start off to get to my best life, so be it. I am ready and willing and able to bring my part.

Cheers for now from my hospital bed. Here’s to #roomservice

How’s your Monday?

Spirited Mama

P.S. I made Dude bring my hairdryer and GHD as I can at least look presentable whilst lying here 😂 Just need to get him to buy me some more pjamas as I really think I need some more right now. What would we do without modern technology. He video calls from home/shop so that I can decide what I need. Love this Dude.

 

Goodbye 2016

By

On December 31, 2016

In Goals, New Years Eve

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Goodbye 2016

I loved you and hated you simultaneously. You pushed me to do things I wasn’t sure that I was capable of. BUT I did it. And I came out stronger, more centered, focused. And somewhat wiser.

2017 will see me taking some people with a pinch of salt, in small doses and limited quantities. I refuse to let others’ negativity consume me. I WILL be living MY life’s. Possibly my best life. Time to live intentionally but for ME. Cheers to 2016 but here is to welcoming 2017 with open arms.

2017

I will be completing my studies. God knows how fearful I was when I started as a fresh first year student in 2015.
Dudie will be starting Grade 2. This kid amazes us everyday. He is intelligent beyond his years, resilient and tougher than I give him credit for.

Dude wants to start studying again. We may even start brewing some life changing plans for our little family.

We will be welcoming our resident alien to our Spirited family. Less than 6 weeks to go now. #34weekspregnant

So cheers for now. Be safe wherever you may find yourselves tonight as we welcome 2017. We will be welcoming 2017 from the comfort of our home.

Enjoy the last day of 2016. Here’s to HEALTH, SUCCESS & HOPE! 

See you in 2017.

Spirited Mama

P.S. I don’t do New Years Resolutions as I think people are too pressured into making resolutions that may quite possibly not even be their own goals. I never conformed to the norms….so I like to do my own thing.

Who wants to be a Millionaire?

By

On December 13, 2016

In About me, Time out

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If PROCRASTINATING was a job I would be a millionaire. No kidding. I am AMAZING at it! I am also AMAZING at working under pressure and to strict deadlines. Today, my brain feels bleh, yet I have so many things that I can say or talk about. I am just not finding the right words to express myself.

I am trying to tidy up my office and get my admin on track because soon I will be going on maternity leave and I would really like to let to let the temp start on a clean fresh slate. And hopefully that temp will reciprocate…. when I am due to return to work.

I have loads of personal admin to sort out too. I still have to organise the resident alien’s nursery. I still haven’t packed our hospital bags @ 32 weeks pregnant (hyperventilating here…) I am having more and more Braxton hicks. And by golly some of it is getting intense. Also, we are doing minor revamps and touch ups at home. And just for the fun of it, we still haven’t figure out what we are doing for Christmas.

So just for today I am taking the day off. I am cutting myself some slack and pretending that I am a millionaire today! I can literally feel myself winding down as it is that time of the year to wind down, reflect on what has been, create some festive memories and start afresh with a renewed outlook on life.

Spirited Mama

Here’s to the Dads!!!

By

On December 12, 2016

In Male vs Female, Parenting

 

If you’re a Dad, congratulations

Kudos to YOU if you are a “hands-on or involved” Dad. It’s quite amazing to see that there are still guys out there who think their role is to implant you with their seed and VOILA they are ‘Father of the year’ because their job as “Dad” is done.

We really don’t show enough gratitude to the dads who really get involved and dirty their hands when it comes to raising their offspring. As a society, we are hell bent on naming and shaming dead beat dads BUT what about dead beat moms? Why is it shoved under a carpet or no one ever speaks about when the mom is a bad parent? There are so many bad/absent/uninvolved/negligent parents out there.

What Dads should know

Please don’t think that my life as a mom is all roses and moonshine BUT I really cannot imagine my life without my kids(yes I am already speaking of the resident alien as if he is here). Parenting is NOT easy. There is NO handbook. We parent by trial and error. What is good for one family might not necessarily be good for another. Everyone is different. Everyone has different parenting styles. BUT they day that we, Dude & I, became parents we made a commitment to Dudie – to always try our level best and to always be there for him! It’s taken 7 years to have another child. I do NOT take this commitment lightly.

For me being a parent is a LIFELONG commitment! You cannot unparent yourself. There is no return to sender, or 7 day exchange period. Please ensure that YOU are sure that YOU want to be a parent – for your child’s sake as well as yours… Spirited Mama

I am 31 weeks pregnant and counting. Dude is doing most of our housework and taking care of us, all whilst holding down his paying JOB too. Granted he is exhausted by 8pm every night BUT hey he is doing it without any complaints…perhaps silently or in his head but he is sure not complaining to us about it.

So today DUDE we SALUTE you for being an AWESOME husband and Dad. Thank You for taking care of us! We love you LOTS!

Spirited Mama

x

P.S. Anyone MAN can father a child but it takes a FATHER to raise his child!

Competition between siblings

By

On December 8, 2016

In Kids, Parenting

Siblings

I can’t believe how competitive Dudie is with the resident alien, who is still in utero. He is literally competing with his brother even though his brother is still very comfortable and snug in my ever growing belly. Last week I was spoilt with a surprise baby shower for the resident alien. A lovely gesture from some of my colleagues. and some even took the initiative to get Dudie a gift or two.

Do you have a baby shower for your second or third child?

When I fetched Dudie from school , I had the leftover cake in the car. By the time we got home Dudie had eaten the “Baby Noah” off of the cake, dug little holes into the cake and was ready to eat the pretty blue booties. I was slightly annoyed as it just felt as if he was jealous and acting out. (How pretty is this cake and it was SO delicious!)

cake

When he saw all the gifts the baby received his immediate response was “he is so lucky to get all these gifts”. He was fine when he realised he also got some gifts though.

Competition between siblings is real

What gets to me is that it seems that he expects to get something if the baby gets something. How can I change that mentality? How do I make him realise that if one gets the other doesn’t necessarily HAVE to get as well. (I actually know of people who buy birthday gifts for all their kids, even if it is just the one kid’s birthday.) I’m sorry that shit just won’t fly with me. Perhaps I need to give it some time. Consistency is key here. We have had numerous conversations about it and will continue with these conversations because frankly there is no need to be competitive. We love our children and strive to treat them both equally and fairly.

I get that Dudie is only 7 years old and suddenly he needs to share his whole world with someone else, his brother. This brother that he has been yearning for… It’s a HUGE adjustment for all of us as we will now be a family of four.

How do you deal with competition among siblings? How do you handle it? Any advice?

Spirited Mama

x

 

 

Having kids is expensive…

By

On December 7, 2016

In Finances, Kids

Are you prepared for having kids?

Nothing can prepare you for having kids. I mean you can prepare and save and do what you need  to do but, in my opinion, you will never have everything just right to prepare you for having kids. Dudie is 7 years old and we have a resident alien in utero, who is due to arrive in less than 9 weeks…

As we are wrapping up 2016 we are also preparing for our new journey of becoming a family of four… This is by far a very exciting time but also a bit nerve wrecking as I think – “I hope we can manage everything”. We have been faced with tougher decisions before and somehow when we put our minds to it we make it work. Dude and I make a mean team. We work for what we want out of life. And we work damn hard to achieve it!

Do you know that we have already paid Dudie’s re-enrolment fee for 2017 in October? We also had to pay for his stationery pack for 2017 in October. That I can still comprehend. What baffles me is that the resident alien is still in utero, we don’t even know when he will make his grand entrance aid his fee BUT we already paid his fee too secure his spot for 2017!!! When I completed the enrolment forms many questions were answered with TBA because frankly we don’t know his date of birth/identity number/vaccination schedule/allergies etc…

School fees, just a drop in the bottomless pit, of why kids are expensive

The resident alien’s fees are almost aligned to Dudie’s private school fees….pardon me they refer to themselves as an independent school. Soon we will have two kids in an independent school. It scares me. The cost their education. The cost of living.

I see people moving their kids to different schools because of the costs… What price tag do you put on you kids’ education? Life in general is expensive. For now we bite the bullet and have Dudie in an independent school and the resident alien in his over priced nursery school.

For now I am going to take a walk to the cafeteria and buy myself a treat…

Spirited Mama

Random Conversations with Dudie:

Dudie: Guys when I have to leave and buy like my own house…can I have the BMW please?

Dudie: My tummy doesn’t feel well.

Me: Why?

Dudie: Cos I ate 5 spoons of honey at home…

Currently in Spiritville

By

On December 1, 2016

In Christmas, Currently

Currently update:

Last night Dudie received a certificate at his prize giving…drum roll..for MERITORIOUS ACHIEVEMENT IN MATHEMATICS in Grade 1. Whoa! this kid only told us that we needed to attend and that he will be getting a certificate. No clue what for. Nada. He was mute about it. He is such a modest child. We are SUPER proud of him. Of course we had to celebrate and at his request for Sushi, we tried out the newly revamped Ocean Basket @MenlynPark. Wow, lovely. We will be back soon. We were a bit stuffed so we agreed that we could do a special dessert over the weekend.

The other night, I was getting so hot so I woke Dude in the wee hours of the morning to ask him to switch on the aircon. He happily obliged, switched the aircon on and went back to sleep. The next morning he says “WTF, why did you wake me to put the aircon on?” My response – The remote is on your side… He says he’s going to put a glass of water on my side and wake me during the night for a drink…

We are torn between slaving away behind the stove to cook Christmas lunch or whether to dine out this year. For us it is the preparation rather than the actual eating of the meal that is our festive spirit!

We only have 10 weeks left before we are a family of four.

Mom, Dad, Dudie and the resident alien. Need to give him a spirited name as he cannot be the resident alien forever.

Today is the 1st of December. Tonight we haul out the Christmas tree and transform our home into a festive place. We will be indulging in chocolate and of course Christmas carols. The countdown to Christmas has finally begun, even though I have not done any Christmas shopping. We have been very pre-occupied with the resident alien but even his nursery isn’t done. I haven’t bought everything that I need or want…

Oh, and I still haven’t packed our hospital bags.

My pet peeve for December – Dude wants to go away for an impromptu weekend. In December! He does this every year and every year I say well then YOU find a place to go to because people book a December getaway a year in advance. Any suggestions? Will have to be in Gauteng though as I don’t want to venture too far from my Doctor or hospital.

Here’s to 2016 Festivities!

Spirited Mama

 

Year end drain and winding down…

By

On November 30, 2016

In Christmas, Holidays

Can you feel the Year End drain?

SO many of us are feeling that year end drain. I know I am and I know my family is too. Gone are the days when Dudie couldn’t wait for Santa to bring him an alarm clock – you know cos he started big school in 2016 (grade 1) and this clock would help him get ready for school every day. Yeah right! This Mama, aka Santa, stepped in and blessed him with an alarm clock. For the record that ship has sailed as the novelty wore off so quickly. No matter how many alarms were set, if he was tired he just would NOT get up. Fuck the alarm clock and all. He will not get done. He will moan and be difficult with each and every task staring him in the face. Until I lose my shit – then we argue and then he says Mom you’re being rude….the joys of parenting.

Winding down for the year end

Whilst we face this year end drain and frantically trying to tie up loose ends, it is also the most wonderful time of the year. We are preparing for the festivities, for Christmas. The festive season is upon us. A time of joy, laughter, lazy days spent around the swimming pool…and lest we forget the final weeks before the resident alien arrives. This will be our last Christmas as a family of 3 because next year we will have another little boy joining our table.

My advice – cut yourself some slack. The kid made it through the year unscathed. And tonight we will shed a silent tear of pride as he owns that stage at his prize giving ceremony. We only have 3 days of grade 1 left. Go on have a drink or eat some cake cos I’m #30weekspregnant remember…10 more weeks…Somehow, I have a sneaky suspicion that the resident alien will arrive earlier. Let’s hope it’s not too early.

Happy festive prepping. We need to finish the baby nursery.

Spirited Mama

P.S. This morning conversation with Dudie

Dudie: Mom can you pray when you are dead?

Me: I don’t know, I’ve never been dead.

Thankful Thursday

By

On November 24, 2016

In About me, Thankful Thursdays

I thought instead of a normal blog post I would do a roundup of what I am thankful for today….

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Thankful Thursday Roundup

My Dude, Dudie, resident alien.
The family and friends in my life right now.
The cooler weather in Pretoria today.
Electricity because whilst I should be studying I made an omelet and I’m watching Lucifer on catch up.
My health, wealth and prosperity (I think I am very blessed).
My home, my bed, food and all my creature comforts.
We only have 6 school days left for 2016.

The little bouts of rain making our garden come alive again.
I have little over 10 weeks left before the resident alien joins us in this realm, well that’s if he stucks to his due date. (I am hoping I can have a natural birth again)

Sometimes life gets very busy and very often I forget to just reflect and be thankful for my blessings. So before I get too lazy, let me get off this couch because I have quite a busy day….
I want to check out the new revamped @MenlynMall and of course @H&M and @KrispyKreme all before I go for my 4D scan of my resident alien.
I also need to factor in study time, so I still need to inform Dude that he is on supper duty, I have an exam tomorrow morning.

Be thankful for what you have…I have so much but I am afraid I could go on writing until infinity if I really set my mind to it.

Spirited Mama

Work work work work….

By

On November 21, 2016

In About me, JOBS

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Rihanna’s “Work, work, work, work…” could literally be my meme today…

Work…enough said

It has been a really challenging Monday. From the time I walked into my office at 7:45 right up until I left now. I have barely had time to pee, that’s how intense it has been in my office. I was planning on working a little longer but my NEED for food right now has been so excruciating that I just packed up and left. I have eaten all my snack bires, fruit and cranberries. There is literally nothing left in my drawer😆 (Note to self-replace snacks at work).

I am beyond tired. I really want to catch up on series but also read my book. Never,ind the fact that I have draft blog posts hanging in mid air and another exam on friday.

I am waiting for Dudie to finish his Golf lesson so that we can literally just go veg out at home. The bonus is Dude is home already and busy cooking supper.

It’s going to be an early night for the Spirited household. Let’s hope Tuesday is kinder to me… can the holidays come already…..

Spirited Mama

P.S. I could eat supper now and just go to bed already.

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