Spirited Mama

Living a SPIRITED life filled with wanderlust, emotions and everything in between

Tag: #momblogger

It’s Play Day..so “Let them play”

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On August 24, 2017

In Christmas, Dudie, Family, Games, Gifts, Kids, Kids stuff

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Let them play…Those words still hover in my mind since the #PrimaTopToys event where the top toys were revealed for the Festive Season 2017! What a fun time the adults had playing with the toys. We got to let loose our inner child without worrying about what others would think of us oohing and aahing over kids’ toys. Let’s be honest, as a parent if you are not convinced will you really buy your child a particular toy?

“Prima Toys is one of Southern Africa’s leading importers and distributor of toys and games; bringing the world’s most famous toy brands and characters to children across various African countries“

I remember one of my first dolls was a Prima Toys doll, a gift from my father’s friend who I think at the time worked for Prima Toys….I wish I had a picture of her.
I’m not a typical girl who played with dolls but I do remember that doll…
Being at the event evoked an emotion, at the time I couldn’t put my finger on it. Whilst playing with the toys in the goodie bag, I remembered the doll and how that doll was a Prima Toys product.

Funny how destiny or fate works…who knew that many many years later I will cross paths with Prima Toys again.

I’m definitely a boy mom and I love the toys as much as Dudie. Troll at this stage is too little to comprehend what is happening. But, he is besotted with his Teletubbie, PO. He giggles and even has a soundbyte of the actual Teletubbies music.

Dudie, obviously, raided the goodie bag I received. He loved the toys BUT that Ben10 Omnitrix was his favourite….until I showed him the hamper that I won…Gracious, that child’s eyes were ready to pop out his head. Why? Because there was a Ben10 Omnitrix Deluxe in there. He wears an Omnitrix on each arm…

And he had just seen the TV ad a few days prior to teh event and really really wanted one. Well, that was me getting the Mom of the Year award from Dudie. Granted, my status might not last long, as any parent knows you can go from hero to zero in 2 seconds flat, but I’ll revel in it for now.

The phrase, “Let them play” has constantly been on my mind. As parents, we are so busy with life/work/kids/etc/etc and sometimes we forget to stop and just be present. Similarly, we forget to just let our kids play. And to play with our kids. Dude and I have had the discussion that it seems lately we have been in “survival mode”. We have consciously made a decision to stop and have at least one “play” session per week night. Weekends are more chilled and we all get to have down time. It’s the weekdays with school/work/extra murals that consume our time.

So Thursdays are reserved for “play” in the evening. Tonight we will play 🙂

Happy Play day!

Mom’s favourite, even though I have NEVER managed to get all the colours in the right order! But I will keep trying 🙂

Spirited Mama

Disclaimer

This is not a sponsored post. Opinions and views shared my own.

Motherhood round 2…

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On August 21, 2017

In About me, choices, happiness, Parenting

Round 2

Becoming a mom for the second time, albeit 7 years later, was like becoming a mom for the first time. The adjustment from 1 to 2 children, for me, was and is major. It feels like I have a house full of kids now.

Never ending laundry…how can we have SO much laundry? Even though Troll sleeps 10 hours straight every night, thank heavens, I don’t. Because I don’t go to bed when he does!

Bring on the routine

Both kids have the same routine. Our supper time is 18:00 – 19:00. Bath time for both kids is 19:00 and then it’s bedtime at 19:30. For my own sanity, my kids MUST go to bed at 19:30 otherwise Mommy is going to lose her shit. We as parents also need a timeout and when the kids go to bed it’s “Adult Timeout”.

BUT during adult timeout we don’t get a timeout, in fact, we hurriedly try and finish whatever needs to be done. Laundry, kitchen, quick spot cleans here and there, and whatever else needs to be done.

Round 2 I thought I had this

Both my kids were induced. I clearly remember the day when Dudie was born. The nurse asking me to sign the epidural consent forms and all I could think about was how nervous I was to birth my child. I didn’t get that epidural as once the show was on a roll there was no stopping Dudie from making his entrance. That baby was born ALL natural, drug-free weighing a 3.4kgs.

With Troll it was SO different. When the nurse asked me if I wanted an epidural, I declined. She reminded me that it was, in fact, an Induction and that labour could get very intense. I said I know. Been there, done that and got the 7-year-old to show for it. I wasn’t as nervous for the birth as I was the first time. What was freaking me out was what about “the happily ever after” when that little person is forever part of our family. The birth seemed like the easy part. The hard part is raising my kids. Troll was born ALL natural, drug-free weighing 4.04kgs.

Same same, yet different

My boys are so similar yet so different. Both unique little beings with their own personalities. What I do know is that my boys are happy. Joy beams from their little faces, so surely it is within them. Don’t get me wrong, they can be monstrous at times but thankfully those moments are few and far in between.

Our lives are busy. And we like it that way but sometimes we need to take a step back and just enjoy the moment. I battle with this and I’m running things in my head and sometimes find myself way ahead of where my family actually is. I am trying to make a conscious effort to be present in the moment. I am making small changes.  I try and spend one on one time with each of my sons even if it’s only a few minutes at a time.

Last week, Dudie told me that he knows that we really love him. Also, he reasoned that I love him 50% and Troll 50%. I said nope, I love you both 100%. His response, well then you have 200% love to give. You have got to love this child’s analytical ability, no thanks to his paternal genes 🙂

Round 2 concludes…

Thinking back I was very scared of having another child. Purely because I just didn’t want Dudie to share me with anyone else. It is a major adjustment for ALL of us but we are gracefully embracing our new life. We welcomed Troll with so much love that it almost seems like he has been with us forever. He was made for our family. He is the last piece to this puzzle.

Watching the boys together warms my heart. Not only do they share genetics BUT they have an actual bond. A brotherhood. And no one can take that from them. As their parents, we will encourage and strengthen the bond. EVen though Troll is only 6 months old he already searches the room for Dudie.

Motherhood can kick my arse on most days but I am happy knowing that even on those not so great days I am doing the best I can…for my boys.

Motherhood definitely is my best achievement!

Spirited Mama

 

Keeping A BREAST with World Breastfeeding Week

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On August 7, 2017

In Breastfeeding, Parenting

So 1 – 7 August 2017 is World Breastfeeding Week.

It’s ironic as Troll, who is just over 6 months old, has decided to “wean” himself from my breast… When Troll was in utero, I decided that I would be happy if I could breastfeed for 6 months. Perhaps I would make it to 12 months. Who knew? I decided to set a realistic goal of 6 months. And true as shit, he weans himself at 6 months.

Also, I think his self-weaning was aided with me being sick for 4+ weeks, being on various medication. The turning point was last week though. I was put on a high dose of antibiotics and was given strict instruction NOT to breastfeed. Of course, I could express my milk but I would just have to throw it away.

If you breastfeed or have breastfed, you’ll know that that milk is “liquid gold”. I would cringe even if we just wasted a drop. Imagine my horror just throwing it down the drain.

My breastfeeding journey is on its way out

As the situation currently stands, I have two bags of frozen breast milk in the freezer. This is the last of my stock pile. I currently have very little milk left. I have tried to boost my supply and even taken the infamous jungle juice. But alas, my milk supply is drying up.

It is bittersweet. This is the end of my breastfeeding journey. I am OK with it. I have come to terms with it. I have NO intention to have any more babies. BUT it is also the start of a new chapter for us.

I am honoured that I had the opportunity to breastfeed my boys. As Troll is now eating solids, which I make fresh by the way, I would’ve liked to have kept breastfeeding for another 2-3 months. I feel that this would’ve prepped him for the world. It may have helped keep allergies at bay. Fingers crossed Troll has NO allergies.

All over the world is celebrating Breast Feeding

Breastfeeding is NOT easy. Once you get the hang of it and your nipples are no longer cracked and/or bleeding from constantly being sucked on by a baby, you may actually enjoy breastfeeding. I also know of some people who find it the hardest thing to do. It’s stressful and yes your milk too can become stressed.

What I find even more ironic is that today is the last day of the World Breastfeeding Week. Today is also the day that I have set myself “free” from expressing and/or attempting to breastfeed again. Troll is happy and so am I. When I offered Troll my breast, he looked at me weirdly and just pushed it away. Now Troll happily just positions his head in between the warm squishy boobs, that once was his only source of nutrition.

Kudos to the moms who can breastfeed for extended periods.

Happy Monday…

Spirited Mama

Kids get sick

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On July 10, 2017

In Health, Kids, Parenting

Kids get sick when in doesn’t suit your schedule

Kids get sick at the most inopportune times in OUR lives. It will either be in the wee hours of the morning, or at school, or weekends, or on holiday, etc. Isn’t is just incredible how kids make a miraculous recovery whilst you are sitting in the Paediatric waiting area? Please tell me it is NOT just my kids who do this. They are happy and playing when we are at the doctor but limp fish and half dead when you have them at home…

Maz, from Caffeineandfairydust, wrote a post earlier this year that resonated with me.

To The Mom Sending Her Sick Kids To School…And Everyone Else

When kids get sick, what are your alternatives?

I know some parents have NO alternative but to send their sick kids to school but dammit it aint fair on the rest who are trying to keep their kids in good health. I empathise with both parents, the parent sending the sick kid to school as well as the parent trying to keep their kid healthy. With Dudie we used to rotate who would stay home so that we don’t exhaust one parent’s leave only. And also not to piss of the employer that one parent is staying out of work all the time.

I remember spending more time than I would have liked at the Emergency Room with Dudie. And thankfully now that he is 7 years old I think we’ve only had two ER visits in a long time.

Troll is in daycare. Fortunately, it’s only half day. But that still makes him susceptible to the germs around him for the few hours that he is there. Thank goodness we have a policy at work in OUR department, Family comes First.

Last month whilst I was on study leave, I dropped Troll at 07:35 only to pick him up again at 10:20. They called to say that he had a fever. With the long weekend coming up, I didn’t want to take any chances and end up at ER for the weekend. I took him to the paed and thankfully it was only a secondary infection but it was enough to warrant an antibiotic…

SO that is how Thursday started. And so we went through our long weekend nursing Troll, who woke hourly every night without fail. This was as exhausting as it was painful. Troll has an excellent night time routine. He cluster feeds from 4pm, then it’s bath time at 7pm and bedtime by 7:30PM. Then he will sleep for 7-9 hours straight. Imagine after such an incredible routine you now suddenly have to wake every hour during the night. Do you see why it was painful? By Sunday Dude and I were walking zombies. We would take turns and just pass Troll from one to the other.

Thankfully Troll got better and by Monday night he was back to his normal routine. I did say “Thank you JESUS” aloud a few times. In fact, I say “Thank you JESUS” every night when I swaddle Troll after his bath, put him in his bed and switch the lights off and just walk out the room. 9 out of 10 times he will be asleep within 2-5 minutes. If not, he normally just needs to be burped again and put down.

Do you get sick after your kids were sick?

Our kids got sick, both Dudie and Troll. Then as luck would have it, when they were fully recovered the parents were sick. For the entire month of June, it is like we were playing musical chairs with someone always being sick. Everyone one got better, except me… I’ve been nursing “something” all this time. It’s not quite enough to get a doctor’s appointment but it is also not going unnoticed… I’m gatvol of feeling like this. Then last week I was better, in fact I was doing great. BUT that something was lying dormant, just waiting for me to let my guard down.

As soon as my exams were done and I could finally just sleep like a “normal” person BAM! I was sick AGAIN! And then Murphy seems to be in my red zone, Troll is sick too… Oh My Lawd…I can’t. I just can’t. For my own sanity, on Saturday I co-slept with Troll. We both got some much needed rest. In fact, we only woke up at 8:51 on Sunday morning.

I do think that Troll will need some meds, so guess where we are this morning. Yep, the paediatrician’s waiting room. I must add that I do love this doctor. He is so gentle with ALL the kids and so very thorough. And just in case Mom isn’t feeling ok, he will happily give mom a quick check and prescription too. It’s a win win situation.

What I would like to know is:

  1. Do you send your sick kid(s) to school?
  2. How do you feel about parents sending sick kid(s) to school?

What do you do when your kid(s) are sick? Do you send them to school/daycare?

I have been on both ends of the stick. I was the parent dropping a sick kid and I am now the parent getting pissed off seeing sick kids at school. I know what it feels like to drop a sick child. We live in a different province than our families. So we don’t have the support that most of my family has, who lives within close proximity to the family. We, i.e. Dude and I, have to do everything, be everyone etc…I also know what I feel like walking into Troll’s class and I see snotty faces. I cringe and immediately wipe their faces. Yep, I wipe the other kids’ faces. Whilst cuddling Troll, I quietly tell myself to calm the fuck down because perhaps those parents had NO ALTERNATIVE.

Yes, it’s annoying to have a sick child but then again if need be, I can always take Troll home or to my office. I do think that it builds their immunity to catch a few germs here and there but within reason of course. I am fortunate to work in an environment that is “family” and “kid” friendly. Well just in my department, not in the Institution as a whole.

Not everyone is fortunate enough to have an alternative, whatever it may be. So for now, I smile as Troll looks like he has made a miraculous recovery in the Paediatrician’s room but will most likely be limp by bedtime tonight. Both Troll and I are fine for most of the day but as soon as dusk starts setting in, we become “sick”… what is this sorcery?

I “see” you when you have no alternative with your sick kids

I’m pretty sure we can debate the topic about whether or not to send sick kids to school until kingdom come…I think we all just need to chill out and cut one another some slack! I see the mom, who is pregnant and battling to hawl her kid from car to classroom all whilst huffing and puffing and looking a little under the weather herself. I see the parent, who is embarrassed to drop the “sick” kid too. I also see the parent who is fuming because someone at school is sick.

Happy Monday! I feel like crap! I need to go nurse my Troll.

Spirited Mama

x

 

Derailed and binge drinking

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On July 6, 2017

In Kids, Kids stuff, Mishaps, New baby, Parenting, Struggles

Not me…the baby…Troll is binge drinking. At first I thought it was growth spurts but it has become a daily occurrence and I guess this is just what he does. I really think I should just connect the tube from my breast pump directly from breast to Troll…

My plans are being DERAILED. Clearly I have forgotten how long it takes to get out of the house with a new baby. Just to get to PicknPay, which is literally across the road from our house, takes forever. I swear it’ll be quicker if I sent one of the dogs with a note and some cash to bring back the goods.

One Sunday I had a plan of action for the day. We would go to church, go to Checkers straight after the service because the toilet paper was on special. BabySoft hasn’t been R79.95 since forever. I wrote about our use of Toilet Paper here.

Then I wanted to stop at Woolworths because I have a gift voucher to pamper myself. And I had to change baby clothes because we had duplicates, a gift we received when I already bought the exact same outfit for Troll.

Well, this is how my plan of action actually went down:

We skipped Church because I just didn’t want to wake the sleeping baby. My 7 year old said “Mom you can just pray harder here at home.” Then my 7 year old took an eternity to get done. In between Troll kept feeding as if it was the end of the world. Me having a hissy fit because the 7 year old showers for an eternity and yet he is the first to preach that we should save water. Oh and then Dude, aka the husband, messages me that he needs to go to PicknPay after work but we should enjoy our outing. I responded that we were going nowhere slowly. At 11am I put Troll down for a nap. I hurriedly dust the bedrooms, get the eldest child dressed and ready for the day. I fold the clothes from the dryer and put the next load. I never hang the laundry. I tumble dry EVERYTHING. Even the ones that say DO NOT tumble dry. I take a quick shower. I nibble on some biltong because with a new baby you kinda forget to eat nevermind make a proper lunch. Then the 7 year old is calling for food. I waiting for Dude to get home from work, just to offer me a few minutes of respite. I look at the clock and think shit it’s only 12:35 but it feels like bedtime again.

Well that’s that. I ate some fruit and some yoghurt. I’ve learnt to stock up on food that you can snack on whilst breastfeeding or handling the baby…One-handed operations only. I never got to PicknPay, neither did I make it to Checkers or Woolworths. I sat down and realised shit I still wanted to go to Makro as well. What used to be a seamless operation now takes forever and a day, planning and coordinated movements…all just to get to the shops with two kids by my side.

I always pack two baby bags. One to take with us when we leave the house and an emergency backup if we need to rush out. My 7 year old always grabs snacks for the road, albeit just to PicknPay across the road. I kid you not. Dude will attest to that.

How do you manage with kid(s)? I only have two but some days it feels like I have twenty…

#thestruggleisreal

Spirited Mama

P.S. My 7 year old says “Mom if you don’t want to smell like the baby vomit just wash with water and soap and you can smell like you”. The honesty of this child sometimes…

 

*Win* an Eau Thermale Avene hamper

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On June 20, 2017

In Beauty Products, Competitions, Grooming, Reviews, Skincare

At the #jozimeetup bloggers event a few weeks ago, I won a spot prize, the Eau Thermale Avéne Hamper. What an incredible spoil! The prize was sponsored by AutographPR and some of you may remember Nicole Sparrow’s post “Please iron the sheets”. So for my pic, I used a towel because I’m a wife/mom/home exec/doctor/nurse/friend/lover/disciplinarian, etc, etc and frankly don’t have time to iron the sheets…

I have sensitive skin and don’t dare chop and change my skincare regime, just willy nilly… If I find one that works and use it forever. Until I tried Avéne…The hamper included the following:

  • Micellar Lotion
  • Mattifying Fluid
  • Soothing Moisture Mask
  • Cicalfate Restorative Skin Cream
  • Cold Cream Shower Gel
  • Sunscreen SPF 50+
  • Thermal Spring Water (If there is one product you MUST try, this is it! So many uses. Some miracle water…)

The products are easy to use. I hardly have 5mins to perform a skincare routine in the morning. It’s slightly easier at night when everyone has gone to bed but then the chores are waiting. I use the mask and do some chores whilst I wait for it to perform its magic on my face.

The result is that my skin is as soft and smooth as Troll’s bottom. The cold cream gel wash is excellent in the shower as my skin feels moisturised just by washing it. The Thermale Water is apparently great for nappy rash. I can’t attest for that as thankfully we have had no issues thus far. But it is great for nicks and cuts as well as razor burn. During Winter my skin gets super dry and itchy, thanks to the Gauteng climate, but I sprayed my legs with the Thermale Water and Voila! No more itchy skin. Dudie seems to suffer from eczema and this water also soothes and calms his skin…I can see the difference.

I am sensitive to sunscreen so I always use a sunscreen separately from my moisturiser. As soon as it is included in the moisturiser – my skin suffers a breakout. On Dudie’s match days I like to add a little extra protection. The Avéne sunscreen is a fabulous add on as my family doesn’t look all pale and ashy as with other sunscreens.

I am very happy with the results thus far. My skin is definitely happy too…

Now, who would like to WIN this hamper??? The hamper is worth R2000 and you will receive exactly what I received, courtesy from AutographPR

Here’s what you need to do to enter this giveaway:

  1. Subscribe to my blog
  2. Leave a comment on this post
  3. Like my Facebook page, click here
  4. Follow me on Twitter @spirited_mama1

For an extra entry: Tweet about the giveaway and remember to add a link to this blogpost giveaway in your tweet.

READY! SET! GO!

Good luck! Winner will be announced on Friday 28 July 2017.

 

T’s & C’s

**Competition closes Friday 21 July 2017.
Open to South African residents only.
Winner will be randomly selected.
No correspondence will be entered into once a winner is selected.
Winner will be announced on my social media accounts and notified via email.
I reserve the right to disqualify invalid entries.
**

Spirited Mama

The hours in my day

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On June 14, 2017

In Parenting, Reflections

Hello, in this little Spirited Family, if you have read some of my posts, nothing is uneventful. Sometimes, I wonder if what is actually happening is real or a dream. By golly, I sometimes sit and reflect on our life and literally end up laughing out loud at some of the shit that happens. This family can be funny….but we are a herd and we love each other. That’s all that matters…

The hours

I’ve been MIA because life has been CRAY CRAY… me getting back to work after maternity leave, Troll starting at his daycare, me getting into a routine with the school run for 2 kids. WHOA! Who knew adding 1 little person can rock the boat that much. For most of it, we have fun in the mornings, even when I’m freaking out that we are running late. Some mornings it’s a screaming match. Some mornings we look like the Brady bunch.

But here’s a rundown of the day before I started working again:

The day started off fairly well. Dudie didn’t have too many issues getting up or getting ready for school. Dude sends me a message “Enjoy your last day at home”. I have been taking Troll to his daycare every morning for a week to get used to his new environment too. I generally sit in the office and watch him on the monitors fro an hour of so. Then we leave for home. After the school run, I dash back to Dudie’s school to buy books on his wishlist from the Travelling Bookshop. (I never carry cash so I had to go swipe my card myself – imagine me giving Dudie all that cash – Uhm I think NOT!). Then my Aunt calls to say they are in the city for a few hours, can we have a quick visit? I say sure but I have a few errands and will call when I’m home. Then Troll decides to be miserable and make a monster poop. I quickly calculate and decide we are only 5 km’s from home, let’s go home.

How do the hours in a day go by so quickly?

At home, I change Troll and give him a solid feed. I make myself a warm steaming cup of coffee. One of our dogs seems to think she is a cat. So the cat decided to become Houdini, and jumped the wall or escaped somehow… Troll decides to make an explosive poop AGAIN! I change him, and voila as I pick him up he vomits all over both of us. So I change him and myself… My phone keeps ringing. It’s the neighbour to tell me the dog is casually lying outside in front of their gate…WTF? How did she get there? I rush outside to take her back in. Give her a stern scolding and let it be.

Troll decides to nap and I think, fuck it, let me enjoy this coffee. Then the estate agent calls, she has a potential tenant for us but urgently needs the key to the flat. So I say ok I will bring the key in a bit. By now, it’s 11am and I now need to race all the way to the other end of Pretoria and drop the keys and then race back for Dudie’s pickup. Then I remembered I needed stuff for Troll. I pack up the sleeping baby and stop at Clicks. OMG!!!! This Clicks is becoming notorious for the lack of “efficient” customer service in the checkout queue. I’m not even kidding. They are by far the slowest I have ever seen.  Whether it is busy or not, they will work at the same snail pace as they usually do. Eventually, I am out of there and hitting the road. Why is it that when you are in a hurry seems everyone else is on a “go slow”?

I make it to the estate agent in record time. I didn’t even switch the car off. I just gave her the keys outside the estate. LOKL. Back in the car – thankfully Troll is sleeping through ALL of this. I rush to meet my family. I managed to hug and greet properly and down a Chai Latté in a few minutes. Ticked that off my list, now to rush to pick up Dudie. On route, I decide to pop a chocolate eclair sweet in my mouth. Now, this is NOT a sweet that you can eat very fast. I get to school and damn this sweet is still in my mouth. As I approach the gate, the teacher wants to talk to me and I can’t open my mouth as the damn sweet is now stuck between my top and bottom back molars… As I try to speak I have drool dripping on the side of my mouth. Thankfully, I just raised the baby to my right cheek and avoided a very embarrassing situation. As I collect Dudie, he announces that he needs to go back for his water bottles. I’m thinking of chaining the damn thing to him, as lately he just seems very blasé about its whereabouts…Well until I ask about it.

What’s another hour in my day…

One more stop. We arrive at swimming school. Dudie has his lesson and I drift off whilst the other moms ooh and aah over Troll in the waiting area. Back in the car, I cover Troll with his warm blanket and tell Dudie to wrap himself with ALL his clothes. I put the aircon on full blast just so that I can stay awake whilst driving home.

I told Dude that if I am passed out by the time he gets home; it’s because I have had 25 days worth of crazy in one day.

Some days I have this all sorted and some days…well it’s all CRAY CRAY.

Spirited Mama

P.S. Dudie tells me, “Mom if you don’t want to smell like the baby’s vomit just wash with soap and water”. Me: Thanks my child, I’ll remember that…

 

Calories and my fitness Apps

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On June 9, 2017

In About me, choices, Fitness, Health, Reflections, Tech stuff, Time out

I never have to worry about calories….

Because I never get the full calorie intake for anything anyway. I.KID.YOU.NOT. Someone always wants what I’m having. A consumable can lie in the cupboard heck even on the table in plain sight and NO one will take it…until I do. Then everyone wants it/some of it.

Also, my family controls my portion size for me so there is no need to worry about over eating when they are around. The problem I face is when I am alone…I love to indulge.

Dudie throws me the “sharing is caring” card. Dude throws me the “I always share with you” card. Troll, aka the baby, is just being himself. If he could eat my boob he probably would… #breastfeedingmom

I must admit, I think I bounced back to my pre preggy body much quicker with Troll than with Dudie, 7 years ago. I guess it’s because now I have to juggle 2 kids, a husband, my job and of course Dudie’s schedule. I know it’s terrible but there are days where I only realise when I am on the verge of chewing my own hand that I haven’t had a proper meal for the day.

Somedays I remember to make a shake and drink it during the school run so that I at least have something. Problem is sometimes I forget to drink it too. Recently, I made a conscious effort to drink more water again. Somehow I got to busy to do that too.

My body is signalling me that it needs fuels but my mind is already planning the next to do list. Even though I am through with the current to do list. Life is busy but sometimes I think I just want to be so in control of my life that I forget to stop and take some time out.

My fitness apps are going bonkers with results of “do you want to adjust your fitness goals?, you did not meet your target number f daily steps, you have many inactive periods (granted this is because I don’t always have the damn phone with me)”. BUT it commends me for waking up on time! That’s a plus right? Even though it shows my sleep records are very poor. Somedays I want to crawl into bed at 9am and just sleep but hey life has to happen in between. There’s being mom & wife, running a house, creating a home, etc. We all do it. And somehow we survive.

inspirational-picture-sayings_15918-0

I need my #momcation

I think I need to take a time out. To reflect. To analyse. To gain perspective. To breathe. I know where my priorities lie but I also need to prioritise MYSELF. I need to show myself some self love.

Exciting times lie ahead.

Spirited Mama

My proverbial death…

By

On May 15, 2017

In Family, Kids, Parenting

I took a leap of faith

Well in 2016, I took a leap in faith and decided that if it is in God’s plan for us to have another baby then we will. I left it in God’s hands. I am a control freak but this was the one decision that I knew I couldn’t make on my own. I needed intervention but I needed God’s intervention, as I just wasn’t sure if we were making the right decision. Turns out God wanted us to have another son. I was nervous as hell as I pee’d on a stick…do you know that both times Dude predicted I was pregnant before I realised it. And he was spot on both times. Maybe he knew something I didn’t. In 2016 when I saw those two lines I was shocked that I didn’t believe it to be true. Dude set out to buy a digital test and it was confirmed again. I was pregnant. If I could do my own blood test I would have.

A blessing as a result of faith

Fast forward to 2017 and we welcomed our resident alien, another son richer. For the sake of this blog we will call him “Troll” as Dude has dubbed him. A blessing indeed. Life as we knew it changed completely. As much as I tried to prepare my oldest son, Dudie who is 7years old, I neglected to prepare myself…Suddenly, there was a new man in my life who needed me. Every ounce of me. Day and night. To say that I’m tired or even exhausted is an understatement. How did I neglect to prepare myself. Well that was so easy. Whilst helping everyone else make the transition and preparing the baby room I kinda got so wrapped up in it all that I never took a moment to understand or even allow myself to embrace this new change. I was ecstatic and consumed with the happy that I never allowed myself to say goodbye to the old me. Much like I didn’t do 7 years ago when Dudie was born. No one can prepare you for motherhood. Well not for YOUR unique individual experience as a parent.

Troll weighed 4kg at birth. I shit you not. Me, I birthed a 4kg baby…I might do a separate post about it. I didn’t struggle to lose the baby weight as Troll literally suck me dry. But who was I kidding trying to wear my push up underwire bra….it’s a killer especially when your boobs fill up with milk.

Who knew I would sing “Jesus loves me” a gazillion trillion times….cos the baby seems calmer when I sing it. And 75% of time he drifts off to sleep listening to my singing. Maybe I could make a career out of it on You Tube…one can wish can’t I.

I am breastfeeding mom. Was with Dudie too. But my golly these kids of mine can suck me dry. Sometimes I think my body can’t keep up with their milk demand. Dudie breastfed exclusively for 5months then went on a boob strike and from then I expressed for a further 3 months. Then I was done, my hopes of breastfeeding for a year didn’t quite materialise. Troll is also being breastfed currently. If we can make it to 6 months I’d be happy but If we can last 1 year that’ll be great.

Just as with Dudie, I am back in my normal old clothes again very soon after having Troll. But I have a tummy roll. Omg the dreaded roll. Dudie asked me the other day when the lines on my tummy will disappear. I responded with “Never. It reminds me that I have you and your brother”. And he also asked if I store Troll’s milk in my boobies…this child of mine has no filter…but I love him.

Finding the silver ling after the old me was gone

There have been dark days where both kids have drove me completely batty. Especially during Dudie’s school run. Someone is always hungry. Someone always poops as we need to leave. Someone is always unhappy about something.

Then there have been great days where Dudie is showered and ready whilst I’ve still got Troll stuck on my boob. Everyone is happy and the morning is as smooth as baby shit.

Don’t get me wrong. I love my kids. I love being a mom. I just think that I need to stop being so hard on myself. But how can I. How can I drop my own standards. If mom doesn’t do xyz, the wheels on the bus go STOP. If mom doesn’t cook then chances are we WON’T eat supper by 6pm which then means Dudie is in the snack cupboard and snacking like a savage dog. How am I the only one seeing that if we break out of routine the shit hits the fan?

Let’s not even get started on Dudie’s homework, oral presentations, projects etc…he is only in grade 2 and I swear this child’s homework will be the end of me. We fight and there have been times where I relieve myself from homework duty but I end up with a 7 year old crying his eyes out cos he needs me. His words exactly. He needs me. Mommy must do homework with him.

A new me was born

Being a mom to my two boys is a blessing and yes I am extremely grateful. BUT this mom needs a break. This mom needs a mom retreat. Soon. Before I lose my marbles. I have so many draft posts that I just don’t get around to finishing right now. Life is so busy. And when I have a few minutes to spare you can bet your pennies I’ll be hurriedly busy trying to finish something, read housework, cos otherwise that too just piles up. Life lately is consumed with laundry. Everyday. I kid you not. You can stop over any day and I bet you will find the washing machine on or the tumble dryer or the load waiting to be washed. Whoever came up with the idea that mom needs to sleep when the baby sleeps was either completely insane or most likely had someone to do each and everything that comes with running a household and family….

I am NOT  the same person I used to be. In fact I am a new me. I’m not even sure I want the old me back but I do know that I miss snippets of the old me. Somewhere when Dudie turned 5 I felt like a person again. Not just a mom. Now throw in the Troll and it feels like I’m back to being just “Mom”.

I get that there are Dads who are very hands on, and granted Dude does help ALOT at home. But what is up with the “mom guilt”? Why can Dad decide to go fish and sleep out with his buddies but if Mom says she is NOT coming home tonight it’s the end of the world? Happy mom happy family right?

Do you do mom retreats?

I’m going to start my own trend #momcation 

Now to find some mom friendly destinations 🙂

Spirited Mama

P.S. Troll is 14 weeks old already…where have I been these past 14 weeks??? Feels like a dream.

Here’s to the Dads!!!

By

On December 12, 2016

In Male vs Female, Parenting

 

If you’re a Dad, congratulations

Kudos to YOU if you are a “hands-on or involved” Dad. It’s quite amazing to see that there are still guys out there who think their role is to implant you with their seed and VOILA they are ‘Father of the year’ because their job as “Dad” is done.

We really don’t show enough gratitude to the dads who really get involved and dirty their hands when it comes to raising their offspring. As a society, we are hell bent on naming and shaming dead beat dads BUT what about dead beat moms? Why is it shoved under a carpet or no one ever speaks about when the mom is a bad parent? There are so many bad/absent/uninvolved/negligent parents out there.

What Dads should know

Please don’t think that my life as a mom is all roses and moonshine BUT I really cannot imagine my life without my kids(yes I am already speaking of the resident alien as if he is here). Parenting is NOT easy. There is NO handbook. We parent by trial and error. What is good for one family might not necessarily be good for another. Everyone is different. Everyone has different parenting styles. BUT they day that we, Dude & I, became parents we made a commitment to Dudie – to always try our level best and to always be there for him! It’s taken 7 years to have another child. I do NOT take this commitment lightly.

For me being a parent is a LIFELONG commitment! You cannot unparent yourself. There is no return to sender, or 7 day exchange period. Please ensure that YOU are sure that YOU want to be a parent – for your child’s sake as well as yours… Spirited Mama

I am 31 weeks pregnant and counting. Dude is doing most of our housework and taking care of us, all whilst holding down his paying JOB too. Granted he is exhausted by 8pm every night BUT hey he is doing it without any complaints…perhaps silently or in his head but he is sure not complaining to us about it.

So today DUDE we SALUTE you for being an AWESOME husband and Dad. Thank You for taking care of us! We love you LOTS!

Spirited Mama

x

P.S. Anyone MAN can father a child but it takes a FATHER to raise his child!

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